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Asshat Mom lets 90 schoolchildren touched diseased bat 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/8/2008 9:56:27 AM
Haha, now all the kids have to get rabies shots!
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: darry
Important Even with the bailout our economy is still f*cked embeded video link 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/6/2008 12:13:18 PM
The dow dropped below 10,000 today. This video sums up why the bailout is just a failboat waiting to happen. [ 1 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv
last post: Shodin
Retarded Histories Top 5 Reasons....to Cross Dress 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/5/2008 9:00:05 PM
The article actually some interesting history in it but why God is it on CNN lol. [ 0 Comments]
sent in by: darry
Funny OJ Simpson's jurors 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 12/5/2008 1:47:06 PM
Normally I wouldn't care about crap like this, but they have the jury questionnaires!  They're long but omg the answers to some of the questions are amusing to say the least.
[ 1 Comments]
sent in by: darry
last post: gig_the_weasel
Funny Muskogee, OK Mayor to be on Game Show 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/4/2008 8:43:21 PM
He'll be on Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader on Oct 24th.  Someone should tell the producers it's not fair to have an actual Fifth grader compete on the show.
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: darry
Funny The 9 Most Badass Bible Verses 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/4/2008 7:11:41 AM
This article contains some of the best quotes ever, for example:
"That was their statement to the world: "Gaze upon our dick tower and despair."

/awesome
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: darry
Asshat Dubai's mega-hotel a tremendous failure 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/4/2008 6:03:00 AM
I know this was on fark but it was just too amusing not to post.
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: darry
Sweet Government Surplus Auctions 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/2/2008 9:23:06 AM
Wow, there is a LOT of really cool stuff on this site.
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: Shodin
Whoa $1.75 buys house on eBay... rat and crackhead extermination not included 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/2/2008 8:37:15 AM
Not that you'd want to live there or anything, but it'd be cool to say you bought a house for $1.75.
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: Shodin
PWNED MI6 Secrets found on camera sold on eBay 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/1/2008 8:43:16 AM
I think there will be a new class in the Spying 101 curriculum this year.
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: Shodin
Funny US Army Room Cleaning Technique embeded video link 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/1/2008 7:42:25 AM
Is it a technique or strategy if only McCain would tell me! [ 0 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv
PWNED Sarah Palin vs Tina Fey's Sarah Palin 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/1/2008 8:30:49 AM
Wow I thought Tina Fey was just being hilarious and making stuff up for the skit. It is even better that she used exactly what Sarah Palin said.
[ 1 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv
last post: Shodin
OMGWTFBBQ Lady Urinals 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 10/1/2008 6:53:40 AM
Yeah this is a great idea, it will catch on everywhere!

Female Urinal
[ 1 Comments]
sent in by: gdbyte
last post: Shodin
Funny Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog embeded video link 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/25/2008 1:23:55 PM
During the writers strike Joss Whedon (Firefly/Buffy TVS) wrote this online show. ; It stars Nathon Fillion (Capt. Mal) and Neil Patrick Harris as a wanna-be bad ass villain and a super-jerk super hero.

It is funny and pretty well written, worth a watch...but it runs almost 45 minutes.
[ 1 Comments]
sent in by: gig_the_weasel
last post: Shodin
Tech Weird requests push buttons of IT pros 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/25/2008 7:04:20 AM
My favorites are the ones near the bottom
[ 1 Comments]
sent in by: darry
last post: reoiv
Youch Man suing doctor for amputating his 'member' 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/25/2008 7:02:59 AM
Yeah....that's messed up.
[ 2 Comments]
sent in by: darry
last post: reoiv
Asshat 2 Teens Charged with Felony Sexual Battery on a Child 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/25/2008 8:20:02 AM
...for sticking an apple pie box in the kid's butt.  No kidding, wow, I don't even know what to say, but here's what some of the parents said,
"...authorities may have overreacted by charging the students with felonies but agreed that something needed to be done."
[ 3 Comments]
sent in by: darry
last post: gig_the_weasel
Bad Ass Mr. Rogers was and still is the man. embeded video link 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/24/2008 6:15:07 PM
I miss Fred Rogers. Here he is taking on the US Senate and showing everyone how much of a bad ass he is. [ 0 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv
Jokes SUBJECT: REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/23/2008 2:49:52 PM
DEAR AMERICAN:

I NEED TO ASK YOU TO SUPPORT AN URGENT SECRET BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP WITH A TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF GREAT MAGNITUDE.

I AM MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY OF THE REPUBLIC OF AMERICA. MY COUNTRY HAS HAD CRISIS THAT HAS CAUSED THE NEED FOR LARGE TRANSFER OF FUNDS OF 800 BILLION DOLLARS US. IF YOU WOULD ASSIST ME IN THIS TRANSFER, IT WOULD BE MOST PROFITABLE TO YOU.

I AM WORKING WITH MR. PHIL GRAM, LOBBYIST FOR UBS, WHO WILL BE MY REPLACEMENT AS MINISTRY OF THE TREASURY IN JANUARY. AS A SENATOR, YOU MAY KNOW HIM AS THE LEADER OF THE AMERICAN BANKING DEREGULATION MOVEMENT IN THE 1990S. THIS TRANSACTIN IS 100% SAFE.

THIS IS A MATTER OF GREAT URGENCY. WE NEED A BLANK CHECK. WE NEED THE FUNDS AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE. WE CANNOT DIRECTLY TRANSFER THESE FUNDS IN THE NAMES OF OUR CLOSE FRIENDS BECAUSE WE ARE CONSTANTLY UNDER SURVEILLANCE. MY FAMILY LAWYER ADVISED ME THAT I SHOULD LOOK FOR A RELIABLE AND TRUSTWORTHY PERSON WHO WILL ACT AS A NEXT OF KIN SO THE FUNDS CAN BE TRANSFERRED.

PLEASE REPLY WITH ALL OF YOUR BANK ACCOUNT, IRA AND COLLEGE FUND ACCOUNT NUMBERS AND THOSE OF YOUR CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN TO WALLSTREETBAILOUT@TREASURY.GOV SO THAT WE MAY TRANSFER YOUR COMMISSION FOR THIS TRANSACTION. AFTER I RECEIVE THAT INFORMATION, I WILL RESPOND WITH DETAILED INFORMATION ABOUT SAFEGUARDS THAT WILL BE USED TO PROTECT THE FUNDS.

YOURS FAITHFULLY MINISTER OF TREASURY PAULSON
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv
Youch Guy shoots himself in the bits and pieces. 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/22/2008 1:00:08 PM
Man decides to front carry his gun and accidentally shoots himself in his penis and testicle.
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv
Games Light Bot 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/22/2008 9:29:40 AM
Yeah I stole this from Fazed but it is amazing.

I love this game. Basically you program a bot to walk around lighting up squares.

This is pretty much all a programmer does all day.  Especially using functions etc.
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv
Asshat Further dumbing down of education 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/24/2008 7:54:39 AM
" For elementary and middle school students, only homework grades "that raise a student's average" will be recorded."
Thank God the teacher's are getting angry, dear Lord. 

[ 2 Comments]
sent in by: darry
last post: Shodin
Politics More about the bailout 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/22/2008 9:27:40 AM
"Frank advocated higher taxes on people with income exceeding $1 million a year. And the idea that the deficit would force tax increases even made it across party lines"

Yay, maybe we won't have to pay for their greediness and retarded mortgages. 
[ 1 Comments]
sent in by: darry
last post: reoiv
Funny Half Life in 60 Seconds embeded video link 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/19/2008 1:36:14 PM
I love everything Half Life and this video is a perfect mesh of Southpark silliness and Half Life. [ 0 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv
Information The Economic Crisis explained in sports terms. 1 stars 2 stars 3 stars 4 stars 5 stars 9/19/2008 9:24:45 AM
Teams = Banks
Players = Bonds/Investments

Posted by Zaasakokwaan on the Something Awful Forums:


Back in 2001, the owners of Team A discovered that they could wildly improve their profits by trading away their expensive superstars and replacing them with rookies. People still came to see the superstars (on Team B) and Team A made mad money. They even finished at .400 for the season.

After that season, (now 2002-3) teams C, D and E all saw that and sent their stars packing to Team B and tried to replace them with rookies. Only now there aren't enough rookies to go around so they troll the Juniors and WCHA for new players who are dirt cheap. Fans still come because many of the bought season tickets and it's a tradition and all that. Teams A, C, D, and E all make insane amounts of money. B wins the Cup, but the owners don't care about that. Some sports columnists write about how this is affecting the league, but the NHL drops a gag order on them and locks them out. Half the hockey blogosphere write about it while the other half fellate B. No one takes them seriously.

The next season (2004-5) the rest of the teams (F-J) in the league get jealous (except B) and fire everyone and look to replace them with cheaper players. Only now anyone with any talent at all is gone and they simply suit up bar league players and any drunks they find in the alley. A, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, and J all make good money but are finding empty seats. Every sports columnist in the land is losing their shit over this turn of events and the NHL issues a pretty-please press release asking teams not to suit up people who are obviously mentally handicapped. B wins the Cup easily. Hockey bloggers write "I told you so articles."

The next season (2006-7) absolutely no one shows up to see the games. Owners (still hungover from snorting coke through 100s off of high priced call girls) promise to 'improve things' and begin to offer trades to other teams. These teams need to improve things too, so they start to trade, except that everyone only has one-legged Jamaicans playing, so they start offering 2 for 1 or 3 for 1 deals. This improves play a slight bit, so they begin offering even crazier 5 for 1 deals with the promise of a 10 for 1 if the trade doesn't work out. Who wouldn't take that? So they start making all sorts of trades, including trading players away that they only have via other trades and pretty soon everyone has been traded 15 times and no one is sure who's on what team and they still have to pay everyone's salary. B wins the cup yet again and the last season ticket holders refuse to renew. (Except for B's, natch)

And here we are, 2008, and no one is watching, attending, or even watching highlights on YouTube. The owners have awoken to find that the savings have run out and all they have are teams that are complete junk and a gigantic piles of trade paperwork for other completely junk players. Teams default on their stadium rentals, impoverishing cities that paid $82 kajillion to build them, which puts tons of city workers out of work and forcing major cutbacks in city services. Fabled franchises like the Montreal Canadians and Detroit Red Wings disappear overnight, sold to places like Galveston and Reno, where the new owners promise to run a 'Disney Stars on Ice' program with the players dressed up as dancing bears.

Team B will win the cup this year and for the next twenty years or so. Team B is probably Warren Buffet.

(Lots of things redacted, but you get the gist.)
[ 0 Comments]
sent in by: reoiv

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