A man is in Las Vegas and losing his ass. He cannot win anything,
and before he knows it, he has absolutely no money left. The only thing
he does have is his plane ticket home, but he has no way to the airport.
He walks out of the casino and sees a solitary cab with the cabby
leaning against it. He walks over and asks the driver if there’s any
way he could just take him to the airport. He swears that he will wire
the cabby the money the moment he gets home, but the cabby is a total
“You know how many fucking losers I deal with everyday that give me
that bullshit story? Fuck you ya piece of shit. Get away from me before
I call the cops”, the shithead cabby says.
Well, the guy walks half way to the airport, finally thumbs a ride, and gets home.
He has an outstanding year in business and makes a killing in the market.
Almost a year to the day, he goes back to the same casino where he
previously lost his ass, but this time he kills. He cannot lose.
Blackjack, slots, you name it, and he's kickin’ it’s ass.
When it’s finally time to go, he walks out of the casino and sees a
line of about 5 cabs. As he looks down the row, he sees that same
asshole that gave him such a hard time the previous year, leaning
against his cab at the end of the cab line.
He goes up to the nearest cabby and says, “How much for a ride to the airport?”
The cabby says $10.
The guy says, “OK. How about I give you an extra $2 and you suck my cock?”
The cabby nearly hits him, and tells him to get the hell out of there before he calls the cops.
So the guy goes to the next cab and the next cab, and so on, asking
the same thing, “How much for a ride to the airport…how about I give
you an extra $2 to suck my dick?”, and each time he gets told to go
Finally, the guy comes to the shithead cab driver from last year,
and says, “How much for a ride to the airport?”, to which the cabby
So without another word, the guy hops in the cab.
As the cab is pulling past the other cab drivers, the guy holds up 2
$1 bills against the side window, smiles and gives the other cab
drivers the thumbs up.Via Redit Dirty Joke Thread